What's Next...?

How often do your thoughts match your actions?

I mean...how often do you think about doing something and actually follow through with it?

These questions are a reflection of my current journey...trying to figure out where the next turn may come...where it may lead...trying to not let trivial things detour the possible.

What does that mean exactly...? Well...again...I'm trying to figure that out.

I was a guest speaker recently at a college where I had an opportunity to share my experiences...the joys...challenges...of being a Native American in modern society.

It brought up a bunch of memories and experiences that I haven't thought about in a long time...which makes the life I lived, 23 years, before I moved here...seem like a completely, separate life.

Identity.

This is what it came down to...identity? Who am I and where do I fit? Where do I belong? I talked about not being accepted by white culture due to my Indian-ness...then not being accepted by Natives either due to my Apple Indian-ness.

So...where does that leave me? I guess it lands me in the middle. The middle has been a lonely place.

This reality has molded me...pushed me through life...into the person I am now. That is my identity. The two seemingly different...contrasting lives...are actually one in the same. This is who I am.

Now what? Are my thoughts complimentary to my actions...or are they in complete contrast?

I've decided to act...make my thoughts happen...and...

it's leading me to begin working on something that I've always thought about.

See...there it is. Lingering thoughts...what if...I should.

Well Wade...do it.

The next step...formulating a direction for putting my experiences into written language.

Yes...a book....



Until next time....